Another Saturday night.

Twenty years ago, I could not fathom staying home on a Saturday night.  Back then, nothing happened until after 10pm.  These days if I'm conscious at this time there's something very wrong.


I've been loading my itunes with all of my old cd's.  Each one carries a special memory; some good and some not so good.  But all of them helped shape the person I am today.  I love my music.  I am a massive fan of pop and anything with a beautiful lyric, melody or harmony.  I don't do angry music.  I don't see the point in listening to anger and angst and all the other weird shit people write songs about.  I have no problem with anyone who favours this type of music, but it's not for me.


I prefer to surround myself with happy songs that make me smile and at times, help me through a really bad times.


There's nothing like hearing an old song that triggers a memory and suddenly, I'm back in my bedroom at Mum and Dad's place.  I'm 16 again, yearning for a boyfriend to love me, dreaming about what might be.  My heart skips a beat and the past twenty odd years fade away to nothing.


I still remember taking a long leisurely shower, rubbing perfumed moisturiser all over me.  Stressing about what to wear, how to style my hair, the make up and of course the handbag and shoes.  Back then, spending $300 for a pair of shoes was nothing.


I'd crank up the latest release and sing away as I got ready for whatever the universe would put in my path.  It was all about matte lipsticks and Poppy King was THE lipstick queen.  I was blessed with a serious pout.  And a red pout was hot.  Mummy had it going on back in the day, although to look at me know, you'd never know it. 


By 10pm, I was in my car, showered in Poison or Lou Lou, on my way to pick up my then best friend...  a person I thought I'd never live without.  


We've drifted apart now.  I miss her.  I miss the freedom of being young and crazy.  When life was a blank canvas and anything was possible.


Now my idea of a perfect night is dinner with the kids and my hubby.  Watching a dvd or falling asleep in front of a dvd.  How life has changed.  


I miss the old days sometimes; when life is crazy and there are a million things I need to do.  But when I put my kids to bed, and they are sleeping like angels, my heart constricts with pure love.


Sssssshhhhhhhhhhh...  Don't wake them!